"Over and over again, we have tried to find a peaceful way out of the differences between ourselves and those who are now our enemies; but it has been in vain.."- George VI - King's Speech, September 3, 1939
This quote, in just a few sentences, perfectly demonstrates the hardships my father has endured for his 25 years of marriage. My mom is crazy. Batshit crazy. My dad is compassionate, loving, funny and my role model. He's gone through the ringer trying to stick it out in a marriage that was, by any definition, emotional abusive. For as long as I can remember there has been no love. My mom was like an abusive roommate who simultaneously stole money from you, undermined your rule and painted you as a bad guy to your son. Manipulation that bordered on sociopathic. And above all, uncompromising.
Since finding this sub I've grown a lot closer to my dad, and I learned something quite alarming: he's miserable. I always knew he was (as was I) but the degree to which he was surprised even me. He was completely miserable and immaculated by a wife who saw him as a doormat that was also fashioned as an ATM. I called bullshit.
For months now, I've been reinforcing red pilled principles he knew to be true but was too scared to carry out. I've backed him at every stage in confronting my mom, and calling out the bullshit manipulation and lies she constantly tries to spring on me and him. Today, it all came to a head. We attempted, as King George so eloquently stated, "to find a peaceful way out of the differences between ourselves and those who are now our enemies". We discussed with her why she was so unhappy, and like every other conversation we have, it fell apart into a shitstorm of finger pointing and yelling. So finally, we presented the ultimatum: reform or get the fuck out. She tried to call our bluff, and we told her she had 2 weeks to turn it around or she was gone. She looked at me for support only to find none.
This will enviably lead to divorce. My mom fails to admit there is a problem, or that she must compromise in a marriage and my dad, with my help, has gotten his balls back. He yelled like I've never heard him and spoke in a tone that commanded respect. I've never been so proud to call him my father. He and I are dieting and hitting the weights hard and I have no doubt he will be able to find someone later on in life to give him something he so completely deserves: a loving relationship.
It's hard. Hurting your mom, no matter how crazy she is, is difficult. Eliminating her from my life may prove to be even more difficult. But this sub has helped me find an inner strength I never knew I had, and in that strength I've helped to improve the life of my dad, whom I love more than anyone.
TL;DR: my dad finally called bullshit on my mom and took control of his own life for the first time in 25 years.
Btw, don't get fucking married.