Image: Throat Choke
My miss and I are lying on the couch last night, with our heads on opposite sides
...just talking shit, and then she drops this on me: "I remember the moment that i knew I could trust you."
Her: "When you had your hands around my throat and you were choking me, almost unconscious."
Me: (thinking: Holy shit. That was when I was hate-fucking you, and when I was still fucking other people) Raises Eyebrows
Her: "That's when I knew that I could fully surrender to you and trust you because I was actually doing it in that moment. There was nothing intellectual about it. It was real."
Sure fucking was. That was about a year and a half ago, the time she's talking about. I was fucking her rough from behind, holding her head back with one hand and choking her pretty hard with the other hand. I just kept applying more and more pressure on her throat until it didn't seem like she could take much more, like until she was making kind of funny noises and holding my hand at the wrist. I guess she appreciated the fact that I didn't keep squeezing harder and kill her. Bitches be cray. I mean, I get how that could be a quasi-religious experience in surrender, but fuck-me I was actually hate-fucking you...
Every time I've really hate-fucked a girl
...she's fucking loved it. I keep repeating in my head "You fucking slut. You dumb fucking slut." and the more into it I get, the more into it they get. It actually weirds me the fuck out sometimes, because I'm all into my belief of "do no harm" and "think good thoughts" and Buddhist style "right livelihood". But I guess you have to give the people what they want...
I remember that once, with another girl, I just started saying it out loud as I'm fucking her, "You dumb slut. You dumb fucking slut." And she just got more and more into it and so would I. And I would spank her harder and fuck her harder and she would moan and scream louder. And then I thought that I better make sure I don't get done later for assault so I say, "You fucking love it. You dumb slut. You love it, don't you? Tell me you love it." Her: "I love it." Me: "You love it what?" Her: "I love it, MakeThemFlaunt". Me: "Yeah you fucking do. Because you're a dumb fucking slut." And then I continued with railing the shit out of her.
The TRP gem here
... is that women love a good rough fucking more than the average BPer can believe and more than most women can admit to, or even understand.
My Current Dilemma
... is that I'm trying to figure out how I can gear myself up to hate-fuck my LTR who I've gotten comfortable with and who I want to maybe have kids with some day, who is someone that I care for and mostly respect, but who I can tell is starting to itch for a good rough-fucking. We're on a seven day break, and that's building up some sexual tension, so that should help. I don't really want to repeat that mantra in my head, but it's really the easiest way to channel the energy I need to rail her like a rag doll. I have 4 more days to figure this one out. I'll probably start lifting heavier, and freezing her out more, as a start. But in the actual bedroom, what thoughts can I be channelling, if not
pure hatred hateful words?
Edit: fyi, I don't hate my girl. I like her quite a lot, actually, though not in the one-itis puppy dog stupid way. I got a few solid replies below, a few of which I replied to thus far. Kind of looking for, "What word-thoughts/mantra" might I be repeating in my head as I bang the shit out of her?" Something that would be okay to let slip out loud. Maybe something like, "You like it when I fuck you hard. You fucking like it rough, don't you?" Thanks for the thoughtful replies. Haters, piss off.