Red Pill TheoryThere are no cool girls, just cool ex boyfriends (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by offthebeatmeoff

This just came to my mind today (while browsing TRP), because I used to always say this to a few of my friends. Whenever you meet a really "cool" girl who may listen to interesting music you never heard of, or maybe has some cool interesting hobbies you don't usually see in most girls, chances are that her ex showed her all that cool shit. Yeah there are a few exceptions such as her father taught it to her, or maybe even she genuinely got into it on her own. Most of the time though, these cool hobbies seeped into her directly from the semen of the man she once dated.

For example, I have a cool friend who hikes and competes in physique. He started dating this blonde who was a total cardio bunny. Sexy, but boring with a couple of red flags. He transformed her into a fitness chick, got her into serious hiking and taught her photography. She cheated. They broke up. Now she's dating some dude who thinks he's hit the jackpot with an insanely cool chick.

I'm sure most have you been the guy that turned a bland girl cool, or maybe you found that suspiciously cool girl. Either way, food for thought next time you meet a girl who is insanely different from the rest.

TLDR; Title says it all

[–]Katavasis 351 points352 points  (59 children)

To be fair,most dudes are also boring as fuck.

[–]drallcom3 94 points94 points [recovered]

It's really easy to be cool. All you need to do is to have some serious hobbies. Even serious knitting will make you more interesting than the average dude.

[–]1Soarinc 52 points53 points  (7 children)

Hahaha, the fact that your knitting got 51 upvotes proves that this my be enough of a "safe space" to admit my cringe-worthy hobby....

gardening, boy oh fuck, I love it! I have 2 rows of edema-me peas and 3 vines of watermelon and some cherry tomatoes. I still hit the gym and do all the obligatory bro-hobbies like hitting the gym and drinking beer at a sports bar, but gardening gives me plants which I consider my "drama-free, DGAF pets" which rather than buying them expensive dog food, they feed me instead. Rather than taking a shit on my couch, I can stand in a populated neighborhood and my tallest plants give me the convenience of an outdoor urinal.

Gardening is also a great way to be 1-step ahead of everyone else if there is ever a governmental collapse brought on by having 20 trillion dollars in debt which grows faster than america's private economy can handle.

[–]drallcom3 18 points18 points [recovered]

Creating life with your own hands isn't the worst hobby to have. Any hobby is good where you can ramble on for hours. Women love it when you're passionate about something (that isn't embarrassing to them in public).

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Case in point, former NFL star Rosie Grier not only took up needlepoint but wrote a fucking book about it.

Look at that goddamn cover!

[–]BoyWhoreWithASword 21 points22 points  (0 children)

wtf is cringe worthy about gardening?

growing food is one of the most ancient and important human activities.... agriculture is literally responsible for human civilization.

[–]TrumpSpeech 11 points12 points  (0 children)

My grandfather was in his garden everyday of his life and he was manly as fuck.

[–]lemurmort 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I talk to my plates about my garden all the time. How the pumpkins are coming along, how much I hate the rabbits who ate my arugula and whatever else. I also throw in sperm donor and military stories.

Seems to work pretty well. I've never considered the gardening being weird, not in a bad way anyway.

[–]eccentricrealist 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Even the Godfather liked gardening his tomatoes

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That's a really cool hobby man, don't be ashamed. I used to help my mom and family back home plant beans and grow some basic vegetables like egg plant and tomatoes. Back in WW2 people had Victory gardens and would grow their own foods. We were an Agrarian society for 1000s of years. Gardening is some manly shit bud. You should be proud for having such a cool and unique interest.

[–]fidelity_ 17 points17 points [recovered]

100% I have some awesome hobbies but you don't have to be into the shit I'm into, just be passionate about something. Shoot almost anything.

[–]KriegerAleks -1 points0 points  (2 children)

I've climbing as a hobby, there is just one issue my favorite version is leading outdoors , It is absolutely awesome and also completely impossibly to show to a complete noob one on one cause they are a fucking liability and will get you killed if they have no experience.

The other thing I find funny is how people are actually put off by serious passion, i've other hobbies too but if i share in a general people are interested if I dig into the meat of my hobbies then they glaze over and give up cause learning something new is hard as heck

There are hobbies I cant respect though, those are the ones that boil down to "I am using this substance", even gaming tweaks your reflexes but what I am refering to is the idiotic "oh I listen to music" or "watching tv/anime" with a reference to non-educational things like true blood, teen wold , movies, suits. For me nothing makes me dislike a person more they may as well say that they kill time by getting high every day.

rant, point over p.s. nothing wrong with some music but it is as addictive as substance abuse if done to excess and is a form of dopamine abuse because of how music works, So if your hobby is mainly listening to music you may as well be vaping smoking or injecting heroin for you hobby

[–]AnalHerpes 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I think the activities you're describing are arguably not hobbies since they don't require any effort or input from the person. They're just consuming something someone else created without putting yourself into it.

Even video games require attention and some effort, although it's probably one of the worst hobbies to have.

[–]KriegerAleks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A hobby is generally anything that you sink your time into on the side , they are the activities we actively pursue outside of our professional lives. Stargazing is considered a hobby , so are all of these and them being terrible is primarily my point, They should not be regular uses of our time, they do not grow us in any way at all

[–]psirico123 41 points41 points [recovered]

Exactly this. Most PEOPLE are boring as fuck. Most people have nothing meaningful to share.

[–]TheLaughingRhino 8 points8 points [recovered]

I've come up with a theory that people who are considered "funny" do so to mostly amuse themselves. Because clearly being around most other people isn't going to do the trick.

The distinction I use is if the person is an active listener and has that skill set and actually chooses to use it. If the person is genuinely trying to listen to you, when you speak and converse, ad is not just waiting to talk, even if they aren't "interesting" per se, I can totally respect they are least attempting to engage the other person , trying to find common ground.

To me, bad conversation is like bad kissing. There are bad kissers out there, but give them time with a good kisser, and with a good enough rapport, you've got a decent make out partner. I see conversation the same way, I think there is an art to not just being a good conversationalist in general ( active listening, asking questions, be genuine, etc) but to set up an environment with the pace and banter and topics to bring a person to their ceiling of conversational ability.

A good example of this is Al Michaels. He's a really fascinating person to listen to, but if you really break down his style, he's very good at keeping the flow of the conversation moving and he's often setting up the interviewer to lob over some good material as well. Bill Simmons did a few interviews with Al Michaels and both have good conversational skills, it's like a tennis match with words is going on, it's a nice steady rhythm between them.

To me, I see it as a challenge. Elevate the quality of the conversation around you. ( I've sort of seen this in dance and sports, one person can dramatically change the tempo, tone and mood of the room or playing field, simply by sheer will)

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

We live in a society where binge-watching an entire series on Netflix over the course of a weekend is considered an accomplishment. People brag about it like they just finished a marathon. Oh, and you're the weird one for not putting your life on hold to watch other guys play sports while you sit around and get fat.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (35 children)

Sure, but there are at least a guesstimated 20% out there that at least have moderately interesting interests, while it's closer to 0 for women, as being anything but average apparently had negative evolutionary consequences.

[–]rathyAro 20 points21 points  (33 children)

Apparently if a girl learns about something "cool" from her boyfriend or father it doesn't count. This seems kind of arbitrary.

[–]CQC3 22 points23 points  (4 children)

Because 9/10 thats exactly what it is. This isn't so much a criticism as it is reality. Humans are creatures of necessity, guys innately know they have to do shit to be anyone or have value (though due to being told otherwise we're having huge issues there aren't we?). Women don't need to do shit to have value in society, so they don't.

There are a plethora of anti-social men who are vigorously interested in a particular topic all on their own, without reinforcement of any sort. They'd rather be left alone with the topic then deal with others. For women, this is almost never the case, reinforcement is needed, incentive. For women it's almost always the chance to become embedded in a particular lifestyle/social scene and work within that hierarchy to satisfy their need for social mobility. Go figure, women have been going to college for decades now and we still need to "encourage" girls to be interested in comp sci or engineering. Meanwhile you have Tommy autism who the world is trying to crush into oblivion by telling him he's worthless and he's pursuing the topic in his off time.

The only fields I can think of on hand that women pursue by themselves is typically the arts--which I do enjoy. Women gravitate to literature at best and light reading in most cases. I see a lot of girls get into doing crafts and stuff, drawing, painting etc. Also, singing, theater, acting, those are pretty popular with women. These are usually the artsy types and are almost never "popular" girls depending on the niche. The truth is, most of these women are average in appearance or lower unless you're talking about rising actresses or people involved in a visual medium which mostly filters out unattractive people in general. Rarely will a very attractive girl be inwardly motivated to pursue a topic unless it relates to her own sexual prospects or social status. This is merely the drives that push us. Men are pushed to create value or die, women are pushed to secure their options so that they'll always have a fall back--that IS the game for them.

So for any guys here to be complaining or stating it with some sort of actual contempt towards women for being that way simply haven't accepted that the world has always been this way. They fight themselves. Women have always been like this--and yes, for the spectrum kids I'll mention that there are outliers, but outliers are outliers. This is the backbone between why you should find some thing to commit yourself to besides a woman, because a man who commits all his efforts to a woman is a man not creating value for himself, he's worthless.

[–]NaughtyFred 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Mods give this guy a point.

[–]1Soarinc 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are a plethora of anti-social men who are vigorously interested in a particular topic all on their own, without reinforcement of any sort.

Can confirm -- there are hundreds of guys on youtube who spend hours in their basement building some type of primitive electric circuit which drives a motor which does something completely unimpressive.

But sure as fuck if they didn't spend 500 hours of their own time building it from start to finish and as you'd expect, they simply use youtube to announce to themselves they reached the finish line and then they move onto the next DIY project and go full-blown, jive-turkey on their next electrical engineering odyssey!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (27 children)

Women only do this to please some guy they want to please, but it's not a genuine interest.

It's like you happen to go to football games because you always went with daddy or your boyfriend. Maybe you learned the rules along the way, support the team daddy and boyfriend supported to feel closer to them and you associate some positive feels with those times but it never was a genuine interest beyond trying to please someone.

[–]rathyAro 12 points13 points  (26 children)

So if you do something because you associate positive feelings with doing it, that's not a genuine interest? What would make an interest genuine?

[–][deleted] -4 points-3 points  (25 children)

A genuine interest is something you further develop by yourself once you have learned about it. Lets say someone introduces you to classical music and you're totally into it and binge on classical records, go to concerts, building up a huge collection and knowledge.

Women never really get into stuff and just do things for associated feels. They tend to hover on the sidelines, just knowing enough about something to attract guys who think they're special when in reality it was always daddy or boyfriend who introduced them to stuff and they got into it to appease them.

[–]rathyAro -1 points0 points  (24 children)

So how do I explain the girl I went on a date with who claims to love sports, works in baseball, and just flew out to watch her team in the world series?

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (23 children)

Sure enough, a poster on PurplePillDebate...

[–]rathyAro 1 point2 points  (22 children)

I def do like to argue but I can be convinced. The only reason I'm rarely ever convinced by rpers is because no one is willing to help me reconcile their theory with what I observe in real life. I genuinely would have thought you would have something to explain the simple case of "a girl who works in sports".

[–][deleted] 7 points7 points

[permanently deleted]

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

She works in sports and wants to fit into her social situation and wants to network / advance her career.

It's kind of a strawman argument and given the atypical upvoting patterns in these comments I presume there is some bluepill / feminst raid going on.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 1 point2 points  (12 children)

I read the thread between you guys. I didn't know there was a whole sub about arguing the stuff said here. What stuff don't you believe/agree with?

[–]UntraceableRP 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shoot me a PM about a discrepancy you observe. Lets see what happens

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It's likely more social than evolutionary (though the two are inevitably intertwined). Most of us would sit around and do nothing interesting without the fire under our asses that is society's expectations of men. It's all about motivations.

What do we reward in men? Being interesting, taking initiative, etc... What do we reward in women? Being attractive, following the rules. What's the result? The 80% of women whose biggest concerns are who Chad is fucking and where she's going out on Friday. Then the other 20% "career-driven" women who really take no initiative and just follow the rules while acting like bitches (making them more successful in school, but not in the real world).

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe I'm boring as fuck or something, but in my experience I've found most dudes are very interesting once you get to know them, and way cooler than me

[–]Hoodwink 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A lot of guys don't actually pick up hobbies and music from chicks they date though - especially the younger you are.

[–]TheRightStuff79 0 points1 point  (0 children)

All most dudes these days want to do is talk about sports, MOTHERFUCKING SPORTS (and their kids if they have any to make them seem like responsible untouchable people at work) and play poker and drink beer when their wives allow it. So fucking pathetic. Women are EXTREMELY boring 99% of the time, but most dudes are just as boring, especially young dudes these days. And they hate you for not doing the same things they do and interrogate you constantly trying to figure out where they went wrong while at the same time trying to persuade you into being one of them. I try to avoid associating with those guys whenever possible, I hate them so much. All they want to do is drag other guys down to their level. They are not your friend. If possible use them like they try to use you. There's nothing wrong with turning the tables.

[–]Chris_Phoenix 83 points84 points  (19 children)

I met a best friend of mine that way. He got to know the girl I was dating at the time through a mutual circle and was excited about sharing his niche interests. He later realized she was just superficially into all the things I was actually into and we hit it off great. In his own words "It didn't take me long to figure out that everything I thought was cool about her was just you"

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 17 points18 points  (17 children)

Take a read of Arthur Schopenhauer's essay On Women. He goes ball deep into what you just said.

[–]notevenatthestart 24 points25 points  (8 children)

You're not kidding. He gets it spot on.

Man reaches the maturity of his reasoning and mental faculties scarcely before he is eight-and-twenty; woman when she is eighteen; but hers is reason of very narrow limitations. This is why women remain children all their lives, for they always see only what is near at hand, cling to the present, take the appearance of a thing for reality, and prefer trifling matters to the most important.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

It's a good quick read. I'm pretty happy I found TRP mainly because it got me reading more than I used to especially with respect to philosophy.

[–]herewegoagaindammi 1 point2 points  (6 children)


what is that mean? not native

[–]ovrsurge 1 point2 points  (2 children)

means 28. Can't 100% guarantee but it makes sense in the context i've seen this format used to treat the words like numbers.

eight-and-twenty = 8 + 20

[–]notevenatthestart 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You're right. It's the slightly more poetic way to express "28" in English as it was spoken a century ago.

[–]Chris_Phoenix 1 point2 points  (7 children)

Thanks for the recommendation, I'll give it a read tonight. I've heard good things about Schopenhauer but haven't found a good starting point yet, so I appreciate it

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 1 point2 points  (6 children)

No problem bud. It's a short read and I'm sure you'll enjoy it.

[–]Chris_Phoenix 1 point2 points  (5 children)

I'm digging in and it's exceeding expectations all around

"She pays the debt of life not by what she does but by what she suffers—by the pains of child-bearing, care for the child, and by subjection to man, to whom she should be a patient and cheerful companion. The greatest sorrows and joys or great exhibition of strength are not assigned to her; her life should flow more quietly, more gently, and less obtrusively than man’s, without her being essentially happier or unhappier."

"With girls, Nature has had in view what is called in a dramatic sense a “striking effect,” for she endows them for a few years with a richness of beauty and a, fulness of charm at the expense of the rest of their lives; so that they may during these years ensnare the fantasy of a man to such a degree as to make him rush into taking the honourable care of them, in some kind of form, for a lifetime—a step which would not seem sufficiently justified if he only considered the matter."

"The nobler and more perfect a thing is, the later and slower is it in reaching maturity. Man reaches the maturity of his reasoning and mental faculties scarcely before he is eight-and-twenty; woman when she is eighteen; but hers is reason of very narrow limitations. This is why women remain children all their lives, for they always see only what is near at hand, cling to the present, take the appearance of a thing for reality, and prefer trifling matters to the most important."

Honestly it's worth buying in print, despite it's brevity

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 2 points3 points  (3 children)

I'm really glad you went out and read it instead of just talking about it. It's really eye opening. Really digging into classic Literature and philosophy is the main reason I'm happy I found this place. This essay is a good start, but keep reading and digging bud.

[–]Chris_Phoenix 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Yeah, it was a solid read. I've been into Nietzsche for a bit, and have a thing for certain classic authors. Since you recommended me something cool, take a look at this. It's 232 - 239 in Nietzsche's "Beyond Good and Evil", one of my favorite passages. I think you'll appreciate it

"But she does not want truth: what does truth matter for a woman! Nothing is so utterly foreign, unfavorable, and hostile for women from the very start than truth, – their great art is in lying, their highest concern is appearance and beauty. Let us admit that we men love and honor precisely this art and this instinct in women: we have a rough time of it, and gladly seek relief in the company of beings in whose hands, eyes, and gentle stupidities our seriousness, our gravity, and our profundity look almost stupid to us. Finally, I will pose the question: has a woman herself ever acknowledged a female mind as profound or a female heart as just? And isn’t it true that, judging overall, “woman” has historically been most despised by women themselves – and not by us at all?"

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

That's a really incredible passage, and I know what I'll be reading after I'm finished with what I'm working on now. Thank you for sharing that.

[–]Chris_Phoenix 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No problem man, I hope you dig it. Usually you can find "Beyond Good and Evil" printed as a single book with "Human, All Too Human", a slightly earlier work of Nietzsche's. They're my two favorite Nietzsche works and are readable as hell. The way he writes is in small sections so it lends itself to daily reading, or reading based on your current topic of interest within the volume, since the ideas aren't linear. Anyhow, feel free to message me if you ever pick up the book or have any more recommendations. I look forward to checking out some more Schopenhauer, happy reading to you as well

[–]solarcon6 60 points61 points  (2 children)

"Show me your musical taste and hobbies, and I'll tell you whom you've been dating."

Even the girls themselves told me several times, it's true.

[–]haxurmind 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"Show me your musical taste and hobbies, and I'll tell you whom you've been dating."

Makes sense to me, even with the occasional exception (musicians). I think they will have a problem trying to pin me down, unless people date their musical instruments. shrug

[–]3whatsthisgarg 130 points131 points  (19 children)

I can confirm this 100%. I'm an older dude than most here, and I am saying this is true of every woman in my life, from every chick I fooled around with, right on up to my mother-in-law (an educated woman!) to my aunts and grandmothers.

Women can have interesting viewpoints and stuff, but it is extremely rare for a woman to reach out and seek some entirely new crazy thing that's exciting.

The reason? They don't have to.

As an example, or a corollary, I walked into a party last week, and the first encounter was two chicks, one hot, one not; same age etc. The hot chick was boring, the not hot chick was interesting and had lots of good conversation, and so on. Why was that?

[–]TheLaughingRhino 132 points132 points [recovered]

My personal experience, most women bore me to tears. It's like going to the dentist and suffering and having your teeth pulled to talk to most women out there.

On the flip side, I can see why a very attractive young woman would have some issues with her personality. If a girl like that is too friendly ( i.e. outgoing) it simply attracts the wrong kind of attention to her. Guys already flock to her, now they will flock to her and fall in love. But I agree with others here that many simply never develop a personality or mature their personality because their circumstances don't require it.

Thing I notice

  • The constant complaining is hard to swallow. Pretty, ugly, young, old, with kids, without kids, they all complain. About everything

  • Most have zero empathy for men. I was at a friends BBQ and a girl who was friends with the wife came to me, complaining about how a guy she thought was beneath her tried to approach her at the mass transit station. She asked me if I thought the guy was pathetic, I said, well I give him credit for trying, it's not easy to get the courage to try. She didn't see it that way.

  • There's almost this vibe I get - I.E. you should be the one to be interesting, you should be the one to be funny, what can you do for me, what benefit can I get out of you. I legitimately feel for super ugly male mechanics who were raised without a father figure. I mean I can see pretty girls working that dude over like a busted cash register.

  • Most don't have the desire or ability to be an active listener.

  • I think the general Western legal culture also doesn't help, everything you do around a woman, you have to think about her suing you for something. You have to consider if you are offending her ( i.e. more to workplace issues)

Maybe the biggest thing I see with most women is that in order to "hold frame" you have to essentially come to terms you are dealing with an emotional terrorist. It's like defensive driving in a new city with massive traffic around you. Mentally, it's exhausting to stay in a constant defensive posture, looking for threats and putting out little fires all the time.

This is why I think there is a subset of gold diggers out there who clean up with rich guys, some aren't supermodels, but some actually play the angle of seeing what the guy wants and needs. But often it's just that, an angle.

[–]cesarfd 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Maybe the biggest thing I see with most women is that in order to "hold frame" you have to essentially come to terms you are dealing with an emotional terrorist. It's like defensive driving in a new city with massive traffic around you. Mentally, it's exhausting to stay in a constant defensive posture, looking for threats and putting out little fires all the time.

100%. It's a shit test tornado hitting you from all sides.

[–]1GroundhogLiberator 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I dated a girl like this. I liked her a lot and was usually able to deflect her constant shit tests, but it reached the point where I couldn't bear it anymore. The last straw was when she said something that reminded me of an ex I still resented. I ended things.

About a year later she got back in touch with me. I don't know if I was just wearing rose colored glasses that day, but I agreed to meet up with her thinking that it might be worth it. But within ten minutes she started with a bunch of "what were we?" and "did you ever really care about me?" and it hit me: I don't like this girl enough to fuck her.

It's a weird feeling to have when you've had sex as a crucial motivator for most of your life. But don't sell yourself short. You don't have enough time on this earth to waste a second on someone who will suck the life out of you, no matter how hot she might be.

[–]Purecorrupt 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I have a decent anecdote in regards to bullets #2 and 3.

I'm on a Co-ed social sports team. Anyways we have one guy on the team that's a little awkward. Think "anime nerd". He doesn't drink and come to find out has an anxiety problem. More on that later. At times appears to have self-esteem issues gauged by his self deprecating comments about his sport performance. He did track so he's fast, but coordination is not a skill set. He also seems to get too detailed. Goes into explain mode in group texts (totally unnecessary).

Anyways after the last game at the bar some drunk guys come over and hit on the girl sitting next to him. In an attempt to get them to go away one of the other girls says "Anime Nerd is her boyfriend". Anime nerd's body language goes 100% do not fuck with me. Eyes roll. Head down. Elbows out. The drunk guys half hearted apologize and pat him. Being touched made his body language even more 'gtf away from me'. Drunk guys leave and another teammate who I guess doesn't realize how annoyed he is Pats him on the back and says whatever and he flips his lid for a second. "Do Not Touch Me". Gets up and walks to the bathroom to cool off I presume.

So the guy who patted him on the back also had a girl come that he met off of Tinder. She basically called him wierd and was baffled at why he would even come out if that bothered him so much. Earlier in the evening she was questioning why he wouldn't drink as well so that probably added to his mood.

Back to points 2 and 3. I attempted to give the guy props for at least signing up for a social league team and staying out even if he has those social anxiety issues. He also mentioned at some point that he only had a step father so I'm not sure how that goes. But none of that matters to girls. People don't want to see weakness.

[–]frys180 12 points13 points  (1 child)

There's almost this vibe I get - I.E. you should be the one to be interesting, you should be the one to be funny, what can you do for me, what benefit can I get out of you

This. I used to be really upset about that awhile back. Eventually I began to accept it as female nature. Felt much better after understanding and accepting it. Whether they're chasing you or not, they still tend to have that vibe.

[–]patrice_plz_come_bac 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You're right. Im still upset about it. It makes me lose interest from the first second.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I couldn't have put it better.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Man, I owe you a lot for this! This is some truth. Whoa!

[–][deleted] 38 points39 points  (0 children)

I think you looking for the wrong thing in women. If you want to enjoy a woman go to her looking for beauty, sex, servitude and an ability to listen and learn. Do not look for her to be interesting, that is what guy friends are for.

[–]Chris_Phoenix 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Because even though the hot one probably had more exposure to interesting things, she had no incentive to persue any of them, she could pull chad regardless and she knew it. Not hot chick persued other interests because it was a bump to her SMV and because she wasn't being constantly worshiped so she didn't have to fight to break away from the endless validation suck that makes most who get pulled in boring

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Women can have interesting viewpoints and stuff, but it is extremely rare for a woman to reach out and seek some entirely new crazy thing that's exciting.

Esoteric stuff apparently is their only crazy niche interest because it tends to correlate well with feels rather than logic.

[–]krsuma 2 points3 points  (1 child)

could be the halo effect as well.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 1 point2 points  (4 children)

The not hot girl could have been really into you and the hot girl might not have been too enthusiastic. I'm not being a dick, but I've noticed that with some really sexy girls. There have been some who were crazy about me so they would talk to me, and you wouldn't believe some of the shit that came out of their mouths. One girl literally said " I know he did a lot of bad things, but Hitler was a really great leader". It was a first date. It was a pretty fucking bold move on her part (I'm not white, Jewish, gay, a Gypsy, or black) so I wasn't really offended or in deep agreement, but still. Other times hot girls were basically mutes with me if they weren't feeling it.

[–]3whatsthisgarg 0 points1 point  (3 children)

The not hot girl could have been really into you and the hot girl might not have been too enthusiastic.

No, but good point. The reason I gave that example was because other than their hotness and their level of intellect, they were equal. They were both slobbering over me. But the funny thing is it would have taken the same threshold of intoxication for me to fuck either one!

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Ok. I didn't have any other context, but then yeah you're right. She probably felt she shouldn't have to put in as much effort as the less attractive girl.

[–]3whatsthisgarg 1 point2 points  (1 child)

She probably felt she shouldn't have to put in as much effort as the less attractive girl.

Right, but deeper, it's a life-long thing. The hot chick has NEVER had to put in the effort, she just has to show up.

[–]Purecorrupt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've found girls that are "educated" past a bachelor's are pretty damn boring. At least the ones I meet (mid or late twenties). Spent all their time in school and never really have anything interesting about them. But as the top comment said - most people in general are boring.

[–][deleted] 22 points23 points  (1 child)

I felt this way the most about my last plate. She was cool as fuck and we vibed on a lot of intellectual stuff. Had me like "wow". She slowly started to show herself, though. Empty. Void. That's when it hit me. Its crazy but this is fact. They're a combo of their exes and use whatever they learned that appeals to pull you in until the coast is clear.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Most of the interests are pretty superficial. You can't knock them for it though. They just picked up what there ex liked. They never had the same depth or fascination as their ex had for it most likely.

[–][deleted] 25 points26 points  (14 children)

You are mainly correct but a girl who is not hot can be quite cool and fun through her own efforts. The problem is noone wants to date her. The girls who are hot and fun either learned it from an ex or their father or brother. Hot girls do not need to be interesting or funny.

[–]Toolman890[🍰] 12 points13 points  (12 children)

Every average to ugly girl I know has been bland and boring as fuck. They just don't come across as stupid like the others, but they're certainly not exciting.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Give me a bland, average looking girl with a nice personality over a hot stupid, stuck up bitch any day of the week, I have a low tolerance for stupidity

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (5 children)

I am old, when I was young the ugly girls liked either sci-fi, video games, cool music or cool movies. Maybe you are not giving them a chance? I am not saying date them, but they were fine to talk to when I was younger

[–]aDrunkenWhaler 0 points1 point  (4 children)

To what end? If you want a buddy, better stick with men. If you want pussy, have some self respect and go gor the 6+ . Sure, you can exchange a few words with a fat witch in some situations, but why befriend and hang out with them?

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (3 children)

I have had and still have female friends who are not attractive. I do not hate people because they are unnattractive and I do not just think all females are just warm holes. 6+ girls are compulsory for fucking but a less attractive girl can have hobbies or interests you share. I assume you are very young, you will learn as you get older that women are not just there for either fucking or ignoring

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (3 children)

The nerdy girls I hooked up with in high school weren't always the best looking, but they were interesting to talk to. They had their hobbies like drawing, guitar, video games (usually generic shit like Halo) and anime and whatnot. They have to put in the effort so they do make themselves more interesting.

[–]Toolman890[🍰] 8 points9 points  (1 child)

But they are bland whilst doing those hobbies. I've played video games with guys, and with girls. It's just a completely different dynamic. They're simply not fun to play with.

[–]theONE843663 2 points3 points  (0 children)

They suck at videogames. It's too easy you have to play like you're playing against a kid who will be upset if you let them win, or if you destroy them. Ugh I hate that shit. Tried playing FIFA with a bitch.... Had to put the CPU on legendary and the AI was doing better work than her.

[–]sunkindonut149 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do you guys also notice the corollary to your statement (that the more boring women are more virginal)? If so, why choose interesting over boring women if you feel that interesting women have lots of exes?

[–]pencilcasserole 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Recently went out with a woman (She approached me first online, even forward enough to invite me out to a bar first message) and while I felt nothing for her sexually (would rate a 4.5), I can geniunely see myself being her friend: Owns her own SFX makeup business, geniunely interested in scientific subjects, and can fucking rock some karaoke, genuinely a fun time, but you can tell she developed these interests because she felt she had to compensate.

[–]AlphaKenny-1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

their father or brother

This is what Ive noticed right here. My current LTR comes from a pretty tight family, parents still married, dads always been around and has 2 brothers, her being the middle. She mentioned early on that she was basically her older brothers shadow when they were growing up. Anything he showed interested in she was right there with him. When the younger bro started coming of age it became twice the influence on her.

None of this is necessarily a bad thing, Ill take a girl from a good family anyday. But Ive been starting to notice that Im the one controlling most of the direction. 90% of the time we do anything it was because I brought it up and took the effort to make it happen and Im realizing all the things she talked about being into when we met werent really her interests

[–]spawnvol 15 points15 points [recovered]

That last paragraph resonated with me quite deeply. I literally had this same theory/concept boiling around in my head about two weeks ago. It came to me when I was reflecting on past girlfriends.

This one particular ex, and the closest I got to marriage, she was like talking to a fuckin wall. But I expanded her my hobbies and interests and thoughts, ideas, everything. And even sexually I fully unlocked her. It was like as her own person she was locked and parts of her hidden—being with me it unlocked all those facets of herself she didn't even know could be open.

I was able to see all this after we broke up two years later and then her stint of hookups, bars, clubs, and boyfriends later showed me how much she had grown during our time together. You were dead on about the music and hobbies.

I sometimes ponder if we had never been together and I didn't enlighten her to her full potential, where would she be right now and how would she be. I did greatly enjoy those 2 years and its ultimate downfall was due partially to me too I suppose too. I had discovered multiple Facebook messages with her ex-bf before me. No texts I don't think. And the FB messages weren't that bad at all, the ex-bf was reaching but she was giving one word replies. I shoulda kept my cool but she lied when I brought it up.

Anyways......got way longer than I expected. Clearly you can tell I regret that night, how would've I played it different. Was thinking of deleting this but eh I'll post it.

[–]endogenic 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Sounds like she lied because she was scared of you leaving her. Captainship mistake on your side perhaps. To my eye it seems you would benefit from mending that mistake. Honesty is the key.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's ok man. There are two girls in my life I still think about constantly and miss. I wonder what would have happened if one of them would have just been patient and stayed with me (I lived a hectic life and moved around a lot). I found them insanely attractive and the rare thing was that I actually liked talking to them. Railing other girls hasn't really made me feel better about it. It sucks, but I got through it and I have no doubt you will either. Feels like I have to run through a 1000 girls before I meet one I really like

[–]kurisuotaku 5 points6 points  (3 children)

She lied, and thus displayed she could be devious and conniving. You did the right thing in dropping her.

She was a liar.

[–]anglertaio 1 point2 points  (3 children)

That’s how men and women work. Her husband forms who she is in the same way her father formed who she is.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (2 children)

or her mom/peers :l we all learn from each other. we're social ppl

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

You're right. The husband in this case would be the stronger influence. It heavily depends on context.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pretty much lol I was never close to my dad. A good 70% of me stems from my lover

[–]zephyrprime -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It was like as her own person she was locked and parts of her hidden

This is a fundamental truth right here. Women are made to be the implements of men; waiting around for the right man to come allow and actualize her. I don't even fully understand it myself.

[–]newmeforever 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This reminds me of my ex gf.

I radically changed her taste in music, and she even mentioned it to me one day along the lines of something like this... "You have changed my taste in music so much, I would have never listened to this kind of music if it weren't for you."


I'm the cool ex bf.

[–]huge_gap 3 points4 points  (1 child)

I'm very boring myself but get pussy from good looks, height, confidence, humor.

[–]RightHandedCube 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same here man, except I'm not even tall. I can fake interesting for about 3 weeks on average.

[–]Hilarious_Haplogroup 9 points10 points  (0 children)

She's not yours, it's just your turn. Enjoy the ride while it lasts, then hop on the next one when the next one is available.

[–]Orobek 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have always thought that girls (at large) don't seek out hobbies or intense pursuits because it's not in our culture for women to be active in that way. Ie they would not be considered as ladylike/ attractive. For example the generalization that women in science are less desirable because having an intense "masculine" career is intimidating to the average guy because she is more likely to make more money and be more intelligent. Just some thought. Neither here nor there

[–]strat_op 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Short and concise but hitting it right on the head. I thought about it myself - how much profit my girlfriends made. My music, my hobbies, my healthy lifestyle, my humor, my attitude. One recently talked to me about how 80% of her career is due to being able to contribute jokes and content copied from me.

Think about this - how much value sou bring to each female you date (for a longer time/seriously). This will make it much easier to avoid oneitis and emphasize your negotiaton position: commitment.

[–]TheMightyFishBus 6 points7 points  (5 children)

Before I say anything. I am not one of you guys. I am not trolling, and I am not antagonising. I want to have an actual debate. DO you seriously think women only do things because of men? Almost every girl I know does some kind of cool hobby, and none of them got it from boyfriends or such. Hell, some of them have never dated before. Do you guys really think women are inferior or something? Or are you just incredibly full of yourselves? Seriously, how can someone be so self-centred as to think that an entire half of the planet would be unable to function without you. I don't know. Maybe there is a legitimate reason. So I am asking all of you. Do you think women just do nothing all day normally? Spend their time waiting for big strong men to come along and give them purpose? Seems kind of bullshit to me.

[–]TheLaughingRhino 3 points3 points [recovered]

DO you seriously think women only do things because of men?

IMHO, it depends on the status of the man in question. I worked with a 1 percent guy ( I mean the guy was an All Star in pretty much every category in terms of social mate value) One of the big things with him is that his uncle stressed to him to never marry a woman who would not cook for him or did not cook at all. Lot of modern women simply don't cook. But for him? Once they found out it was one of those quirky things he'd frown upon, they learned and learned fast. If he liked long hair, they grew it out. In terms of preferences in the sack, basically he had a giant blank check. He'd get cards, brownies, baked goods, small trinkets, emails, notes, I mean watching it was surreal. The women at work, the ones his age range, had a pact that no one would buy him a birthday gift, because they were fighting over a girl who had broke the previous pact to only spend X amount on him each by agreement. They'd wait in the hallway, wait in the parking lot, it was like he was being hunted as big game.

Would they learn to cook for a beta orbiter who they married because their options dried up? I honestly doubt it.

Sociology 101 - Men are socially defined by their careers, women are defined by the man they marry (and to some degree, the "quality" of her children by societies viewpoint)

One thing men don't face, most women have tremendous pressure to marry and have kids. Esp in a certain timeline in their lives. Once their female "friends" start to marry off and have kids, it can be emotionally taxing on the girl. I know a girl from college who just wasn't a very attractive girl, she was a bridesmaid like 30 times for all her cousins and other relatives and I could see it took a massive toll on her and her sense of self worth.

A man can have worth without a woman in his life. Society doesn't care that he's single as long as he's good at his socially approved career and it's considered respectable. A woman's sense of self worth is tied to the quality of her mate. She can have a great career, a good education, but if she's alone and barren, she's still seen socially as a loser. Men don't enforce this, women do. Women, IMHO are just downright vicious to each other, esp their single lonely friends.

Non western women, I've observed, tend to have their own interests more than western women. I know it's not a hard fast rule, but it's my general observation. I do think in many non western places, the ratio of women to men is higher, thus based on competition, women have to amp up their game.

Something I've seen said a lot, and I don't honestly understand, and from both men and women, is the concept that they did X instead of Y, and they "blew it" If a person really likes you and wants to be with you, they will see your behavior in a positive light. If they don't like you, they won't. I think folks have a stronger conviction that they have more choice than they do. Some women think, if I do this and that, he'll commit. When odds are, the guy will commit if he's simply the kind of guy to commit and this is the right time and place for him to do so.

Be true to yourself, men and women, even if it's not marketable. If you don't like to cook, you never liked to cook, then don't do it to just try to lure a guy into a commitment. Eventually you'll resent the other person ( even if it's not their fault) for doing things you don't want to do to "appease them"

Same with dancing for men. I see alot guys pushing it heavy, because it does imply girls. I do agree, give any new hobby a shot, a decent shot, to see if you will like it, i.e. present a fair chance for yourself. But if you don't like it, don't do it, even if it limits more girls in your life.

I think many women do participate in hobbies they don't actually like or want, because they believe they have far far more control over the end result of commitment than what actually happens in reality.

I've come to terms with the reality that just about all women, they will only extend any courtesy to you, if they believe it furthers their goals with you, whatever that might be. On the flip side, I think the lesson for TRP folks, is to give, when you decide to give, with your whole heart, and not with any expectation of return. Give and be generous in a way you realize most women will not treat you. I'm not saying be a sucker. But I am saying, if what most women do frustrates you, then make it a point to not be that way yourself.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How is this any different to men improving themselves to attract better women?

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I never said women only do things because of men. I suggested that a large majority of girls pick up cool hobbies that they normally wouldn't have because of a bf or father. A PC version of what I said would be. Aside from hobbies that are typically seen as the norm (make up, travel, netflix) many women will pick up an atypical interest as the result of being in contact with a man they really admire. It's literally even shown in pop culture. If you've seen Dexter, you'll remember that Deborah Morgan started to copy Frank Lundy when she began falling for him. One example would be his 1pm lunch habit.

I don't think women are inferior. I think they are biologically different. As such, they have different skill sets. I don't think women would function without men. I also think men wouldn't function if they're no women. I mean that in a very general sense not in only a workforce capacity.

Like the top comment says, a lot of people are really boring, so again this depends on context, but depending where you are, a lot of women literally do nothing all day normally. A lot of guys do too (I don't consider videogames productive besides as a stress relief). I wouldn't phrase it as waiting for a big strong guy. I'd say most people are pretty apathetic especially after working long hours, and most people if they can muster up the enthusiasm to do something will pursue an activity with hopes of meeting the opposite sex (sometimes the same sex). A lot of guys will workout initially to be more attractive to women. That might be their only hobby. Depends on culture, depends on age demographics, but I can say that most people do nothing.

If you ask anyone here you'll get somewhat different answers every time. I'm one of the lucky guys and a large majority of my interactions with women are positive. I've dated multiple girls from multiple cultures (Filipino, Indian, mixed half black half white, deaf parents, white, Armenian) and had girl friends from a wider variety of cultures and back grounds. I've met probably around 2-3 who I can say are genuinely cooler than me, but a vast majority aren't that insanely interesting. It's a consequence of living more sheltered less fucked up lives, which I think is a good thing.

[–]emmastoneftw 14 points15 points  (6 children)

What about a bland dude that is turned cool by a cool chick? Some girls are driven, and learn cool shit on their own and turn a bland guy cool, and then that guy goes and finds a new bland girl and the cycle continues. That is how a society works. We learn from each other. To say there are no cool girls would say the same thing about guys imo.

[–]pizzalover24 7 points8 points  (2 children)

I'm a guy and I feel exposed by this post. I don't have any 'cool' hobbies. Just the usual guy stuff about soccer, work and gym.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just learn one. Just one that you can really get into and enjoy. One of mine is cooking. Like Sunday I went to a butcher and had a femur sliced up and I made bone marrow infused with garlic salt and oregano to be spread on vegetables/bread. It's not hard man, and it's useful. Yours can be cooking, it can be cars, it can be DIY projects. I would suggest something practical and useful, but anything is better than nothing. You just have to give them a try.

[–]bassline8 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Soccer and gym is cool as hell.

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points

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[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That would be great. I'd love it if everyone in this society improved in general. I have met some really cool chicks who loved their dads and their dads got them into cool shit, and the girls pursued it on their own later in life. Usually, from my general observations, is that these girls want a guy with the same interest. They don't want to teach a guy about it from scratch. There are exceptions made, but it's not the general case.

[–]wailei 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Completely agree with OP. It's always the boyfriend who is cool. Plates just cheat and copy...as usual :)

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

You can't blame or be mad at them. They liked the guy. They wanted him to like them back as well so they feigned interest in what he liked, and eventually grew to like it as well. It's pretty normal behavior, and I find it really flattering, and it's a cool way to know if a girl really likes me, is if she copies me.

[–]RedDeadlift 1 point2 points  (2 children)

I disagree. In my experience, this is not true. When I was mid to late 20s (~5 years ago), girls I dated who were 18-19 actually had great taste in music and introduced me to some cool bands. They mostly had lame ex-boyfriends who definitely did not show them those things.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

That's a fair point. Remember that these girls came from high school though. As weird as it sounds girls in high school, if they are active are way more interesting then most girls. Because it looks good on college applications, or because their friends are doing it, they participate in a sport, they might play an instrument, they usually do some volunteer work through special olympics or key club. It's borderline mandatory for them to be interesting if they want to go to a good college. See how many keep it up later. I do agree with you though.

[–]RedDeadlift 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah yes, that makes sense. To an extent, high school has so many sports, activities, and clubs that it is fairly easy to pick up a hobby or two that can make someone more interesting. And you're right- it's borderline mandatory.

Agreed. Keeping those interesting hobbies up after you leave school is another story though. I see a lot of people just fall into the work boring job/pacify yourself routine (video games, drinking, watching Netflix or sports). Myself included to a certain extent, but I'm working to change that.

[–]Master_of_Ritual 1 point2 points  (1 child)

So, shouldn't you seek out sluts then? Imagine the amazing suite of personality traits and abilities an n>1,000 woman would have, especially if she migrates from scene to scene. She would be superhuman. She would be Legion.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'd be really impressed if a girl had 1000 LTRs. I didn't say you should chase after boring girls or interesting ones. Just made an observation that seems to hold true in a majority of cases.

[–]PM_Me_Your_BootyPlz 6 points7 points  (2 children)

And guys get it from their friends or girlfriends or parents. I don't see what your point is. Everyone gets their interests from somewhere.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

With the advent of the internet I think people's interests can be a lot more diverse than they once were. I was heavily involved in BMX since about 1997. Back then the only practical way you could find out about it was through word of mouth. Several years later I saw a whole new generation of riders getting involved who had only heard about it in television, but it was through the Internet where they really learned.

Hiking is another example. There is no hiking community where I live, but my hiking group (that I started and run via internet) has 148 members. I've taken about a dozen people out on their first overnight hikes, and a few have really gotten into it.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I'm not implying they come from thin air. I got into volleyball because I was tall, and volleyball girls are sexy. I got into lifting because I was insanely self conscious about my body (I was 14). I learned how to cook well because my mom told me most girls can't cook anymore and I need to learn well for myself (highschool). I got into traveling because I thought a lot of foreign women were sexy and I liked hiking because a friend got me into that.

I'm just stating that most hobbies from women stemmed from an ex bf or their own father.

[–]shethatisnau 11 points12 points  (12 children)

I dunno man, I love horror movies because I grew up watching them, have moved abroad and lived in two different Southeast Asian countries because I wanted to and my lifelong hobby of art made it happen. Most of the music I listen to I discovered on my own. I might pick up a band from a guy I'm seeing or into but rarely do I obsess over it the way I do something I found and happen to love. Most of the stuff guys tried to get me into never really stuck because I didn't care that much about it, whatever it was.

[–]aDrunkenWhaler 2 points3 points  (3 children)

I have yet to meet a women that doean't have 'travelling' as a favorite hobby. Including those that don't travel. Adventure, escapism, freedom, no fear of judgment etc. Women that travel solo, well, we all know what that turns into... Despite that, watching movies, listening to music and art you say? How fucking extraordinary and original.

[–][deleted] 3 points3 points

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[–]aDrunkenWhaler 0 points1 point  (1 child)

And when they say Art, what they really mean is photography and sometimes drawing or painting. But they know shit about what focal length means, what is a vanishing point and never heard of Caravaggio.

[–]DoesNotMatterAnymore 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Exception that proves the rule.

[–]Orobek 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In my experience, most people in general are just boring. An equal number of men and women I've met have been boring, and an equal (smaller) number have been interesting.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children)

Then most people in general can learn from you.

[–]Southfarthingdank 6 points7 points  (3 children)

The idea that girls don't have any real interests is something I've been noticing in my past couple years of high school! Every guy is passionate or knows a lot about something, whether it be video games, sports, whatever. It's incredibly rare to find a girl that actually has knowledge and a passion about anything! Why is it like this? It's incredibly frustrating.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Hobbies that are naturally appealing to women (caregiving, homemakeing, beauty in art, etc.) are lauded as antiquated and boring. Girls are encouraged to play sports, as evidenced in the 2016 Olympics wherein the US had more female athletes than male. Men aren't ostrisized or lambasted for participating in traditionally male activities, which include anything that results in a sense of accomplishment (sports, video games, creativity of the arts, and so on).

As an example, women love to cook not because of the meal they create but because it brings joy to others.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Hang out with Hispanic, Italian, or Black grandmas, Their love is directly proportional to the amount of food they try to cram down your throat. They're fantastic women.

[–]2 Senior Endorsed Contributorvengefully_yours 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wait, you mean Facebook, cats, shoes, and phones aren't great hobbies? The 44 year old I'm seeing says she is into cars, and has always been. Heard that before. They say it because I'm obviously hard core into cars. This one, I dunno, she is going for broke with an old Cutlass, so maybe. They do enjoy riding with me in my vintage tin, no doubt there, but extremely few are into getting dirty.

That is part of why I'm still fucking her after almost two years.

[–]karpathian 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You'll notice them also take on words and phrases from previous exs, one thing you should watch out for is if they start using new things that aren't in anything they watch, that you use, or that they've used before.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I only met one in my life and she really had niche music / movie interests. I'm not sure how much it was social circle related (she's a photographer and was hanging out with all the cool kids) but she apparently was into niche music from a relatively young age. She has an aspie / autistic streak though, was never more than a 5, gave me constant shit tests and AWALT applied obviously. Ain't no unicorns out there.

One of her friends was totally into me and went to niche music parties later on to find someone like me (most guys at those parties are skinnyfat / neckbeard incels and the male to female ratio is like 90/10 or worse). I still doubt she really likes the music.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Damn, so I made my ex an outspoken, funny, insightful individual (these are things people have told me)? Now I feel worst for some odd reason. She was boring as fuck when I first got with her.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Don't. You added another cool individual to the world. Nothing wrong with that. Go make another one.

[–]magic_carpets 0 points1 point  (5 children)

Dude ill have to check if its you next time but this is the second time the same post pops up on MISC and TRP

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 2 points3 points  (4 children)

It probably was. I posted the phrase in a comment for this one post about how a guy converted this girl into being a conservative. People liked it and I thought it would make a good post.

[–]magic_carpets 2 points3 points  (2 children)

I was talking about this http://forum(dot)bodybuilding(dot)com/showthread.php?t=172668631

But probably same person

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wow. That dude literally copied me word for word. Pretty flattering though.

Check the times. I did it first.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can confirm, my mom is now a hockey fanatic because all my dad does is watch hockey. She only watches the hometown team though

[–]a_nus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Usually the beta of the relationship will adopt the interests of the alpha. It just so happens that most relationships that make it to the light of day have a dude that's more alpha than the girl (for obvious reasons.)

But have you ever met a couple where the girl is obviously more alpha than the guy? I have, and in those cases, it's usually the guy mimicking whatever the girl is interested in however bland she may be.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Musician Grimes was semenized by PicturePlane - had she never been who knows if she would even have the talent she does now

[–]Trump_will_win_2016 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is huge because it destroys the belief that you can't attract certain "types" or "cliques" (Hipster girls, artsy girls, fitness girls ect.) I've found that if you can run the underlying principles of game on a girl, and have the social skills to tailor your message to your audience, you CAN attract them.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

This is so idiotically wrong that I have to assume it's a troll post.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's not a troll post. If you have a different opinion just say it. This is a place for discussion. Just saying it's wrong doesn't really add to anything. If you have a reasonable differing opinion, lay it out. I'll listen.

[–]aanarchist 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Cool girl had sociopath ex boyfriend who made her suicidal, among other mental problems. do not want.

[–]GunsGermsAndSteel 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Also if she's an amazingly good fuck... how do you think she got that way?

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's a different question man. She could have just had one bf all her life and became comfortable enough to really go at it with him and picked up a lot of tricks and shit. Most girls that really really get around usually just starfish from my experience. Usually the really good ones had LTRs and on top of that really really liked me so the enthusiasm was through the roof which IMO is a really important aspect.

[–]SickeningPiss 0 points1 point  (1 child)

This is so accurate girls use you until they suck you dry literally and then move onto the next pansy. Sometimes its better to be a care free pizza eating chad then someone who has qualities a girl can use for herself.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No reason to be negative brother. You know the saying, Forgery is the ultimate form of flattery, or something like that. If she's copying you it's because you're a cool handsome guy worth copying. She's doing it because she likes you, and wants you to like her back.

[–]theeverywhereman 1 points1 points [recovered]

Ex plate Goes from partying every night to

  • Boxing 3 times a week

  • Reading The Prince and Meditations and Monocle magazine

  • Using a standing desk

  • Watching MMA

  • Playing boardgames

  • Eating bacon

Leave them better I guess.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You're doing the Lord's work bud. If you really want to help the world then date fat chicks, turn them into fitness chicks, and release them back into the wild.

[–]Stationarity 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is just a variation of an old saying:

If women ran the world, we'd still be living in grass huts.

[–]RobertCarraway 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is why women can not be the creators of culture. They are vessels. They fill the empty spaces in the structure of male society, and are filled by male society.

Unknown to most - women are not even the vital force behind their own liberation. The big foundations created womens lib. The elites are separating society into it's component parts and they encourage strife between all parts. Divide and conquer. We are a conquered people.

Father and son. Man and Wife.

[–]wiwe97 -1 points0 points  (1 child)

The only issue I see with this theory is that if the cool girl learned it from her ex wouldnt the same apply to cool guys. Learning from their ex that is.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It could happen. I'll admit I have one girl friend that was way cooler than me. She rode a motorcycle, travelled a lot, knew a lot about beers, and was really tight with her family. That being said, she was the exception. It's more of a male trait to go out and try to be the best at something to attract female attention. It's how we're wired.

[–]wesleyaaron -4 points-3 points  (3 children)

Fuck man, do people really believe anything "cool" about a female (probably) came from her learning from a guy? That's kinda fucked up. No, that's like, really fucked up. Have some respect if you're looking for a woman.

PS: Not trying to be all SJW, trust me. I just can't believe people actually think like this.

[–]Vuhrami 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not anything cool - some things or even most things. If a woman is dating a dude, and he doesn't bore the pants on her after the initial stages, she's more than likely going to want to keep him around (perceiving him as alpha/captain).

So the dude shows her some things that he's into, and then she latches on to them because she now wants to keep him around. And this works for opinions too (there was a post about a guy who changed the girl's political point of views): I dated a girl for a long time and all she wanted to do was get married. I straight up told her I did not want to - shit storm ensued but I held my frame. One month later she told me she didn't mind not getting married as long as she was able to stay with me.

As long as you prove your value - women will take on your hobbies/beliefs and integrate them as their own.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's just that we're wired differently. Most girls we're designed to fit the mold, to get by while guys had to be more extreme aka the reason why there are more male criminals, and more men geniuses. There aren't good biological reasons for a woman to push the limit to attract a mate, but there are plenty for a guy.

With that being said it makes sense that most girls would be attracted to cool guys and latch on to their hobbies/interests. It could have been her father growing up or possible an ex. There are some exceptions just like how for every 10 Einsteins there was a Mari Curie.

[–]rexbacchus27 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are being a SJW, but that's ok. You are here, you will need this info one day, son.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

As the old saying goes, "...When she extrapolates on some cool obscure punk or metal band, it's the same as her belching up chad's cum bubble."

[–][deleted] -3 points-2 points  (2 children)

This is such bullshit ... guys and girls can be cool of their own volition.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

They can be. The post was just a general observation not an engrained rule that applies to every human being that ever existed.

[–]oxykitten80mg -2 points-1 points  (1 child)

Genius hypothesis! It makes total sense.

[–]offthebeatmeoff[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thanks man. Glad I could give you a different perspective on things.

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