I recently posted about my two year LTR learning experience and the beta-ization that happens during that time as my re-entry post in to this TRP subreddit.
In that post, /u/coolasice007 posted this quote and analogy from the one and only Patrice O'Neal that really resonated with me once more. I remembered reading this years back and was only reminded of it recently. I would like to post this for myself and the rest of you who are looking into an LTR to digest.
You're a sport fisherman.
You catch this fish and like any other sportsman, you show it to your friends. You take a picture, you look at it, and you throw it back in the water.
Any girlfriend, wife, or a significant other is a fish that jumped back onto your boat. This fish will flap around on your boat and run all the other fish away. You tell this fish what your job is but she says, when she flops back on the boat, "Is that all I am to you?"
And as a man, with this dichotomy, you say: "No... no you're the fish for me and I'm not a piece of shit. You're the last fish I wanted to catch." So, now, you're dating.
Next, the fish says, "You love me?" and you reply, "Yes, yes I love you fish." And the fish says, "Well, then, now that you love me... why do you still have your boat? And this pole? And the bait?"
So what she is saying is that she wants you to stop being what you were to get her. It was your job and what made you come together but you give that up, for her, the one and only fish. One day down the road you're with your "unicorn" fish and she just looks at you and says, "You don't even have a boat. Look at that guy over there. He has a boat. You used to be this great fisherman."
Have a good rest of your night, gentlemen.